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China, September 2005 Day 4 We started early this morning with a very watery porridge breakfast and more eggs than any person has a right to eat in a day. Still, beggars can't be choosers and at that time of morning (around 6 a.m.), only the porridge place was open. We went back to the hotel and packed up our little day bag with a package of Chikin-In-A-Bizkit, two bananas (courtesy of the hotel), and two small bottles of water. Promptly at 7 a.m., a small bus pulled up to the front door and two young ladies came out to take our tickets and usher us onto the 19-seater bus. The second we got on, there was a loud commotion. A lady with Very Bad Hair was yelling at the driver. It quickly became apparent the conflict was about the air conditioner. I had a good giggle in the back as I translated for Poobie. After about two exchanges, he told me I could stop. Once the VBH lady was calmed down and somewhat appeased, Ms. Chu, our guide, made an announcement. On some stops she would lead us and give an explanation, but on some we would just have a bit of "free time," but on all, we were to be back to the bus at the appointed time. If anyone was late, 2 or 3 minutes, that would be fine, but if you were late 3-5 minutes, you would have to sing a song or tell a joke as penalty for making everyone else wait. If you were 10 minutes late, you could either take a taxi to the next destination, or draw a circle and sit down in it. The next tour would be along in 24 hours and you could pick up where you left off. Our day went as follows: TS1(Tour Stop 1), Confucius Temple AKA Temple of the dueling megaphones. There were about 3 tours going through the temple at the same time and each had a guide with a mini megaphone. None of the tours were more than 10 feet away from each other at a time, therefore I couldn't understand anything our guide said because it was drowned out by the other two. Before we got out, we were warned that the "antiques" on sale on either side of the temple were most definitely fakes and some were even "pre-broken" so when you picked it up, it looked fine, but when you set it down, it was broken. In any case, DO NOT TOUCH ANYTHING. TS2, Yu Hua Tai Scenic Spot and jewelry mart. We were dropped off in front of the jewelry mart, all thinking that this was what we were there to see. Only after you got through the first few yards and the displays about gemstones did you realize you were supposed to BUY stuff. We both hightailed it out of there and went to the actual scenic spot, a fog-wreathed pagoda, built on the spot where a monk delivered such a moving sermon that a rain of flowers came down from the heavens. The woods nearby was also a place where thousands of early Communists were "martyred." TS3, People's Memorial Sculpture just on the other side of the hill from Yu Hua Tai to commemorate the struggle of the people and liberation from blah blah blah (pretty much the likes of my family and the horrible fate that has befallen the PROC now... Gasp! Free market! GAAAAHHHH!!!). TS4, Zhan Yuan palace and famous gardens. Very well preserved with an old carving of a "tiger" symbol the emperor Qian Long wrote. We sat down to a very bad show of traditional Chinese instruments with electronic music accompaniment and refreshed ourselves with weak tea and dried soybeans as a snack. Then plate spinning tumblers entertained us a bit. Just a little bit as we figured out pretty quickly that the girls were just contortionists with plates stuck to the sticks they were holding... Where's the skill in that!?! TS5, Communist propaganda museum and original headquarters. 'Nuff said. TS6, Wu Xi lake and forced family-style lunch for 20 RMB per person. It wasn't too bad, but during lunch there was a sad auction of brush paintings (sad cuz no one was bidding) with the artist sitting and looking morose. One of the ladies at the table asked me if I was Poob's tour guide. I just smiled and told her I am his wife. :) Raised eyebrows all around. TS7, Stopped at the other side of lake to enjoy view and look at fake rockery. TS8, Dr. Sun Yat Sen, father of modern China, his mausoleum was huge and impressive and beautiful. We were given 1-1/2 hours to climb to the top and take a gander. There were three hundred some-odd stairs and it was hotter than hell out, but we were the first of our group to make it to the top. The views were impressive and the grounds well-kept. When we got back to the bus, we were told that his body is actually in Beijing. TS9, Tea tasting! Nope just kidding, we got one pot of tea and a 10 minute sales pitch for Zhi Sha teapots. Shoulda seen it comin'. Most people were gone by this part of the tour, and after the tea tasting, there were only six of us left. The other four guys were going to the Presidential Palace and we were given the choice of either taking a taxi back to the hotel or tagging along. We didn't have anything better to do, so we went. TS10, Presidential palace, like many such places is full of history and interesting only if you know the history. Otherwise, it's just a building. The tour took maybe 40 minutes, with the tour guide saying a piece about each room. For us, it could easily taken less than 10 minutes. We were given taxi fare (RMB15) to go back to the hotel and hailed a green VW Santana. The ride only cost RMB11. Later on that night we went out to walk around and came upon a night market, but were dismayed to find no good food-stuffs. Went to bed at 9:30 p.m.
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